Teardrop

There are numerous food stands located in the streets of Vallarta. La Hormiga is my favorite because they make quesadillas which are cooked on a grill separate from the meat and are filled with frijoles (beans) that are made with vegetable oil. They open around 11:30pm and stay open till about 6am (I've never been that late!). For 7 pesos (a little less than 70 cents), you can get a really yummy quesadilla.

M is the only employee who's not a member of the family that owns and works at the stand. He caught my attention early on because he spoke English like he lived in the States and his manner was also more Americanized. His tattoos also stand out - especially the teardrop next to his left eye. A tattoo like that can mean several things but generally means either he killed someone or someone died when he was in prison. Some people get them just to look badass, but I don't think that's the case with M. He was forthright about being in prison the majority of the 10 years he lived in the States. But he wouldn't tell me what the teardrop meant when I straight out asked him tonight.

How can I not be fascinated by this guy? I want to know his story because I know it will be of a life I can't even imagine. Just thinking about being in jail for 7.5 years made me feel a little claustrophic and freaked out. Alden and I talk about how our feelings about being here can change so easily even though nothing is really changing in our lives -- about how it's all one big mind game. What kind of games must your mind play when you are locked up? Do emotions change from moment to moment? How do you live your life when you're 30 and for more than a quarter you were in prison?

It's 3:40 am; I really need to get some sleep.