Steps Closer

I just finished purchasing my friend K*rt's ticket to come down here and fly back with me, the cats, and my stuff. I finally made the reservation yesterday, but hesitated to make the final decision until the last minute tonight.

As usual, nothing was easy. I didn't have enough frequent flyer miles for even a one way ticket on @merican. (Even though I had more miles with #nited, their flights were a lot more expensive as well as were their baggage charges.) There is an option to buy more miles and the crazy thing is that it turned out that I needed to buy less miles for a business/first class ticket than a coach ticket. The disadvantage to the ticket is that it's on an 8:30am flight; there's a 5 hour layover in Dallas, and we can't sit together (meaning the cats won't be together the whole time but I'm hoping that once we're in the air, I can put them together with me in the extra legroom in business class). But the great thing is that it's enough of a layover to visit my cousin and family in Texa$!

And of course there's the money stress of the cost of it all. It's hard living on credit and balance between necessary spending and overspending. Because really *all of it* is overspending. But at this point, it's my best option (withdrawing money from my IRA is an option but I don't think it's a good one) and I need to go forward (and further into debt) and have faith/confidence that I will find a job back in eNYC and start being able to both cover my expenses and pay off my debt.

I went on Craigslist last night and looked for awhile. Still not sure if I can bear going back to computer development work or if I will look for something else. I really, really, really hate to give up on photography because I really do love it more than ever. I have one lead of a photographer in CT who's looking for a second shooter. She wants a resume so I spent today putting that together and I think it's pretty much set. I'm thinking I should push to get second shooter jobs no matter what because they're on the weekend and the pay even when it isn't great, is pretty good. And if I decide to pursue the corporate job route, I can actually do both.

I have to say that I have been feeling nothing but support from my friends and family about this move. It's been a really great feeling. And even some of my friends/acquaintances here have been positive (although I think they're less positive because my decision to leave calls into question their decision to stay).

Today I had the feeling that it's the right decision I've made. I'm not 100% happy about having to do it or the details of it. I will miss many things about my life here. But it's the right thing to do at this point. And more than anything I'm excited to see where it leads me and what it leads me to.

Sunday the miles purchase will go through and then I have to purchase my ticket by Monday evening. And then on Thursday May 27th, 3 weeks from today (and 5 years from the date I flew here for the first time), I will officially be a New Y0rker again.